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Why is bullying harmful?

Some people think bullying is just part of growing up and a way for children to learn to stick up for themselves.

But bullying can make children feel lonely, unhappy, frightened, unsafe and think that there must be something wrong with them.

Signs that might indicate your child is being bullied include tummy aches, nightmares, reluctance to go to school and loss of confidence. They may lose contact with friends and seem isolated.

Why do some children bully?
There are a lot of reasons why children bully. They may see it as a way of being popular, showing off, or making themselves look tough. Some children bully to get attention, and some just like making other people feel afraid of them. Others might be jealous of the person they are bullying, or might be being bullied themselves. They may not even realise that what they are doing is wrong and how it makes their victims feel.








                                                                                    

                                                                                                    Why are some children bullied?
Some young people are bullied for no particular reason, but usually it's because they are different in some way - perhaps it's the colour of their skin, the way they talk, their size or their name. Sometimes young people are bullied because they look like they won't stand up for themselves.






What can I do if my child is being bullied?
If your child is being bullied, listen to what they are saying and be supportive.
It is important to make it clear it isn't their fault. Ask your child how they have been dealing with the bullying, talk about what else can be done and what action you can both take to solve the problem. Reassure them you will consult them before taking any action.
Remember that it is very hard for a victim to do something to stop the problem. Other people must make this happen for them.
Discuss the bullying with other parents, or support groups, who may be able to suggest ways they have helped their own children. Raise the issue with your child's school and ask them what they will do to stop the bullying - suggest that the school contact the bully's parents, or appoint an adult minder for the bully. Encourage the school to develop a "no bullying" policy if they don¹t already have one, and keep working with the school until the bullying stops. You could help your child develop a plan to deal with bullying, including how to get help. For example, help your child list all the adults they trust, who they could phone or go to for help. Write the names and phone numbers on a card that they can carry with them.
Children should first try ignoring the bullying child, telling them to stop, and walking away whenever the bullying starts.
Encourage your child to always tell an adult they can trust. Explain to them this isn't telling tales. They have a right to be safe.
There are a number of ways that you can encourage confidence in your child. You could try pairing them with a more robust child for protection and as a role model, or have your child learn self-defence skills. Encourage them to spend time with their friends and provide them with opportunities for making new friends - bullies hardly ever pick on people if they're with others in a group.
If your child is different in some way, help them to be proud of it. A confident child is less likely to be bullied and will also be better able to deal with any bullying which occurs.